Lets take a break from business and talk about relationships. Healthy relationships are as important as business relationships.
First and foremost, there is no such thing as a perfect relationship. People are the core components of a relationship. People have flaws and make mistakes. Thus, every relationship with have flaws unique to it as well. The key to making a successful relationship lies within four core elements: experience, honesty and understanding, forgiveness, and desire.
People learn from their mistakes; making experience a key factor to relationships. Experience is the result of time, failed attempts, and knowledge gained from those failed attempts.
Even after fifty-years of marriage, a couple will still hit rocky moment. Yet, they have learned how to deal with each other and are able to overcome the trials they encounter. For example, it takes getting to know someone, their ins and outs, in order to know what makes him/her tick. Knowing how to avoid confrontation is ideal. However, this is not always possible. Therefore, learning how to handle altercations will help to smooth the rocky paths in the long run.
Next, a relationship needs to be filled with honesty and understanding. The worse thing for a relationship is for one person to keep their frustrations bottled up deep within their soul. One must overcome their fear and pride and tell the other person his/her concerns; this means being honest. The other person must then do their best to be understanding. Put yourself in the others shoes; see things from his/her perspective. Then, the two can begin to surmount their problems.
Thirdly is forgiveness. When things become a little (or even a lot) sour within a relationship, one’s pride can make it difficult to utter two little words: “I’m sorry”. However, after much experience, one will soon learn that it can be the quickest repair tactic. Everyone makes mistakes, so it is the couple’s responsibility to forgive one another and try not to make the same mistake again.
Lastly, the success of a relationship lies with the desire of the two people. A relationship is hard, strenuous work, but the rewards can be priceless. There must be a desire to want to make the relationship work. Without desire, the relationship would crumble at the first sight of adversity. Every morning, each person must make choice, a choice to press on in time of joy and in times of adversity. Their desire, accompanied by experience, understanding, and forgiveness will create a bond that will hold the relationship together. A wise person told me that you may not like the other person all the time, but chose to love them despite all things. In other words, I may love you, but I don’t have to like you right now. However, if just one person decides to throw in the towel, the relationship will suffer tremendously. It takes the whole heart of two people for the heart of a relationship to beat strongly.
The Do’s and Don’ts of a Relationship:
Dont’s:
1. Don’t date another girl/guy behind your girlfriend’s/boyfriend’s back
2. Don’t lie about where you are going or who you are going out with
3. Don’t stand your girl/guy up for a date
4. Don’t make the same mistakes over and over again (actions speak louder than words)
5. Don’t try and change who the other person islove him/her for who he/she is
6. Don’t expect your guy/girl to pay for everything
7. Don’t expect them to be perfect because you will only be disappointed when you realize he/she is human and makes mistakes
8. Don’t expect him/her to be able to read your mind (if something is bothering you, you have to speak up)
9. Don’t call him/her too much during one single day (a phone call or two will suffice)
10. Don’t be clingy. While you are trying to be close all the time, he/she may be trying to push away
11. Don’t assume the worst; obtained all the facts before you draw your conclusion.
Do’s:
1. Remember each person has a past; in order to move forward one must let go of the past (Learn from it and move on)
2. Honesty is honestly the best policy. Be open and truthful at all times
3. Give each other the space you need. It is okay to have a life outside of your relationship, just remember to be honest about it. Besides, it will give you something to talk about later
4. Allow him/her to do something nice for you once in a while
5. Become best friends and let him/her know he/she is special to you
6. Be aware that when you begin a relationship you will now have to deal with your own problems, his/her problems, and the problems that arise between the two of you. Be ready
7. Give him/her the benefit of the doubt. Trust that he/she isn’t doing anything to hurt you. (remember not to assume the worst)
8. Have faith in the other person
9. Amongst the hustle and bustle of everyday life, find time to spend some quality time together (you can go out or just stay in, as long as you are together, alone)
10. Forgive one another. Holding a grudge will cause tension
11. When you fall in love, hold nothing back
Being in a serious relationship with someone is anything but easy. It takes a lot of work for two people to share a life. Each person is going to make mistakes; it is the other’s job to forgive them. A friend told me “love isn’t just an emotion; it is what you are willing to do for someone.” Relationships are about putting someone else above you. Ask any couple who has been married for fifty years and they will tell you that there were times when they couldn’t stand each other, but their love for one another helped them to get through the rocky moments of life. A strong relationship is built by overcoming trials and tribulations. Experience can strengthen a relationship. A strong relationship will overcome pride and chose to love instead of holding grudges. A successful relationship takes time and patience to build, and the end result could be a lifetime of love.
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January 7th, 2009 at 1:50 pm
I agree with everything here…. If only everyone on earth was to have all of these qualities, then many couples would make it untill death parts them.